Sex Matters: Why men won't see the doctor
No wife will be surprised that studies have shown men visit doctors much less often than women do. Now, new research is beginning to give us an idea of the psychology that lies behind their avoidance.
A study in the latest edition of the Psychology of Men and Masculinity reveals several themes in men's reasons for not seeking medical help. Men's need for control and self-reliance is a big reason for not wanting to go, with a good number of the nearly 600 men surveyed agreeing with statements such as "I don't like feeling controlled by other people" or "I don't like other people telling me what to do."
Other reasons men say they don't want to visit the doctor's office:
- Their problems aren't big enough to worry about.
- Their problems are embarrassing, and they'd rather keep them private.
- They dislike discussing things that might bring up emotions.
- They're worried about the cost or other practical issues such as transportation.
"One of the main rules of masculinity in American culture is to be rugged and self-reliant," says Michael Addis, a professor of psychology at Clark University and one of the authors of the paper. "Just the fact that you're having a problem with your body can be shameful to some men."
In his research, he's found that not only do men seek help for physical and mental health problems less often than women, but their visits are shorter. The men and their doctors usually ask fewer questions. Nobody knows exactly why, says Addis, though "most people's guess is that it has something to do with the male gender role."
Of course, all of this varies among people; some of the manliest men have no trouble going to see someone.
And the problem is not limited to guys.
"It's hard to get your head around, but women struggle with masculinity, too," says Addis. "Men are in the dominant position in this culture. If women want to get in a position of power, they have to follow the rules of masculinity."
For some, that means avoiding medical care just as much as their partner does. Think about that next time you nag your dearest to make an appointment.