Recession Tip For Wives: Lay off Your Laid-off Husband

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WE have been through unemployment twice in our 33 years of marriage. The first time we had young children; now we are empty-nesters. We moved to another state for my husband's job promotion, bought a house, uprooted me from a stable job that I enjoyed. It has NOT been a disaster; in fact, I like the city where we live, and I have the best job I have ever had, but I am TIRED. I am 60 years old, and I get up at 5 a.m. daily to do my part. I was working part time at the same place before the job loss, and loved it. I went fulltime to get health care benefits for us both. I still love my job, and it gets me away from my husband, who seems to work pretty hard at finding something, but I just can't be around him all the time. I could say so much more.

Jann of KS 6:39PM February 12, 2012

oh puleeesss! I have to pay ALL the bills, do all the housework and child care, cooking, errands, etc. AND coddle the unemployed man-child who's been out of work for 3 years now ? I think not. In fact, I'm starting to think one person in this marriage isn't necessary.

Julie of GA 8:50PM September 16, 2011

I'm with Wife's point. My husband has been layed off for 13 months now, went to school for 7 years to be an electrical engineer. We get interviews but no actual hiring. We have 3 kids under 5 and I work two full-time jobs to make ends meet because we have lost our health care and my youngest has severe speech delay and the county said they have had cutbacks of about 60% so I should get private speech for him, which runs about $50.00 an hour. Yes, I feel horrible that my husband has had this happen to him. It is not right. He's worked so hard, but why is it everyone tells the women "look at the silver lining." What silver lining? There is no silver here. What do you say to your little girl when she is 4 years old and says, "mommy, can you just hold me." Because I literally haven't seen her in days. Is that the silver lining? Is my silver lining that he mops the floors and cooks for me? Well, like that is even happening, but even if it were, I could find somebody for a couple hundred bucks in this economy to do that. Give praise to all of those women out there, who are so exhausted, you know you still come home and clean the house, do the grocery shopping, laundry, organizing while still trying to look alive, because God forbid if we lose our jobs. hang on for the family. Remember, it is not the womens' fault either that their husbands got layed off.

Pasley of CA 4:58AM August 24, 2010

You`ve obviously never been a woman who`s had to live with a man in crisis.The reason women think depressed men are mad at them is because when things don`t go well for men they become emotionally, verbally, and a lot of times physically abusive.If a man is`nt happy most of them don`t want anyone else to be happy either,especially their wives or girlfriends.And the more supportive a woman tries to be the more a "depressed" man will walk all over her.If a woman is depressed and 'irritable" as you call it,The man in most cases won`t try to cheer her up or comfort her,He`ll usually just label her a bitch and either be very mean to her or pout and ignore her.Also, todays wife whose husband is laid off is usually to busy working overtime and trying to run a household to kiss a grumpy man`s behind.

Susan of OH 11:15PM April 24, 2010

You're a bitch.

Alyssa of NY 5:00PM April 02, 2010

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lorancepre of AK 2:11AM March 31, 2010

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peryehewit of AK 2:11AM March 31, 2010

After spending 50-60 hours at the office while my laid off husband spends 0 time working and no more time helping out around the house than he did before (because of his moping and groaning) I am about to "lay off" him! Instead of an article about how to pamper your laid off husbands feelings why not an article about how wives in this situation can deal with having to be the bread winner, wife, mother, counselor...

POD of KS 7:41PM February 04, 2010

We women want men to show us consideration during stressful times whether it be pregnancy, post natal depression, pms, or just life.
Why is it such a big deal to show the men the same consideration during a life event that hits them hard? Why are men slandered as "overgrown babies" for wanting some extra encouragement and a little graciousness during a major life stressor? They ARE people with real emotions.

gia of CA 1:00AM September 28, 2009

Obviously many responders don't like the way this article is written. But after being laid off for 6 months, it's pretty "to the point". That's not to say a woman has to give in to every whim of her man, but anything that comes up because he is laid off shouldn't turn into finger pointing.
Fortunately my wife is employed and carries our benefits, or else we wouldn't have any. If she's working, I try to take care of the house work and hopefully pull my own weight. So it's a 2-way street. No matter which gender is involved, everyone should pull toward the same goal - find employment.
http://iwaslaidoff.info

laidoffguy of IL 8:44PM July 27, 2009